Thursday, February 11, 2010

Now what?


I've been wrestling with change. I love it and hate it at the same time. I crave change on a regular basis, but am resistant to the kinds of changes that I can't control. Does that make me schizophrenic? Quite possibly.

I am the parent of four teenagers. This is a fact that I love. They are fantastic people, genuine, authentic, honest, funny. I love each one of them for who they are and how they are. But lately I've been thinking about how I parented when they were little. It seems like things of faith were a lot more concrete back in those days. We made eggshell crosses for Easter and talked about what they represented....we baked cookies and made crafts and caught bugs and fingerpainted, and managed to weave the truths of God into every project. It felt solid, right, peaceful.

Now, our days are filled with calculus and physics, college classes, kung fu, shadowing a veterinarian, running, working out, facebook, friends.....good stuff, but harder to draw clear cut lines that are tied to Truth. Harder questions. Difficult processing. It feels transient, grey, frightening.

Truth hasn't changed, nor has my love for it, the Word, the Way. Life has a funny way of changing, though, and with it children grown and change as well. Its good. Its necessary. Meat is harder to chew than milk, I guess. Parenting on the threshold of adulthood is a little harder to embrace than toddlerhood on some days. Thankfully, a pan of brownies, a good soundtrack and open conversation still work their magic.....even when the subjects have changed.

1 comment:

Barb said...

So thankful you have started writing again! You needed to!!! Love you!! XOXO